Testimonio desde Alemania

It doesn’t come alone. It comes with a feeling of exhaustion, weakness and deep sadness. For a very long time I thought those feelings were the result of the never ending confrontation with vulvodynia. Just now, after exactly 15 years of irritated skin, irritating discharge, falsely treated yeast infections, that most of the time weren’t infections to begin with, I start to understand the connection. We all have read it so many times, we all know the story of how the body tries to tell you something about the soul (But what! What, dear body, is it, that you’re trying to tell me?!) – but do we know our own story? The story of us: us as the child of our parents, us as teenagers, us in relationships to others? And do we know the story of our parents, the story of our grandparents? The privilege of living in times, in which we are allowed to look deeply into ourselves, it is our duty to do so. Because what we carry in us are not only our experiences, but the experiences, traumata and fears of generations before us. Generations that didn’t have to opportunity or the courage to heal. 

Don’t treat your body like a stubborn child, that resists to act the way you want it to. Treat your soul like the child you yourself are, and your body will heal. Because your body is you. You are your body. 

After trying almost everything both academic and alternative medicine have to offer, I know that there’s only one true healing and that is the healing of the soul. And while it might seem intimidating to be confronted with all the pain of those before and around you, just know that: you’re not supposed to heal them or even help them, but to grow past them and into the you, that is waiting to be unburied. 

Seek help from a therapist, be patient, know the worth of the inner work you’re doing and most of all: Brace yourself to become exactly what you’re supposed to be.

You are on the right track.